The Missing Link

	Everything that had happened, had happened. It was not the events, the experiences themselves which had been the illusion, it was the environment. It had been difficulties which had been enforced on me, and the difficulties which I had endured that had been the illusion. An illusion within an illusion, which I had first recognised in respect of my feelings for Marie. It was because I had known that my environment was an illusion that I had become so confused. As with most of the other points that I had finally become aware of during the previous few weeks, that my environment was an illusion was something that I had recognised, and been aware of in respect of specific events. However, I had only now been able to put my awareness in respect of specific events together, and apply my awareness to my journey. I could not sleep that night despite being tired, instead I travelled to the spirit plane and returned with a message, which I contemplated for some time before having a long and well deserved sleep. The following morning, I knew that it would no longer be necessary for my awareness to be in hindsight. It was time for me to be aware of what was occurring as I lived each event, and time for me to live my awareness. This was true of my awareness to this point, but I did not appreciate that I had much more awareness to bring to the surface, or that there were still many aspects of awareness which needed to be visited collectively, to enable me to become aware of bigger pictures. That my environment had been an illusion changed nothing. Everything that had occurred, had occurred and my environment had certainly felt real. It had been my environment, and my environment had been an average, everyday environment. My journey had been completed from within my average, everyday environment. That I had known that my environment was an illusion had been a product of my awareness. Awareness like all experience is a double edged sword, a two sided coin. I had effectively been experiencing both sides of the coin simultaneously.

	Experiencing both sides of the coin simultaneously, had been confusing and my confusion had been a part of the example. Even though I had been experiencing both sides of the awareness coin at the same time, I had often not applied my awareness to what I was experiencing. As I reflected that morning, and as I soaked in the beauty of the earth plane, I felt that my journey to awareness had been a fascinating journey. I received an image in my mind, God was smiling at me.



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	The Missing Link
	In hindsight, the end to my difficulties was certainly within my grasp. If I had grasped the end of my difficulties, Jesus would have been right when he said that the end of my difficulties was days away, but I did not grasp the end of my difficulties. I allowed the opportunity to pass me by, unaware of what I had done. The following morning, my mind was at peace. I accepted that I was either meant to complete the task for the business, or I was not meant to complete the task for the business. If I was meant to complete the task for the business, everything would fall into place, when it was time to complete the task for the business. In the meantime, it was my spiritual journey which required my attention. I had no idea of what to expect that day, but I did feel that whatever occurred would be significant. That morning, two phrases continued to repeat themselves in my mind. Initially, I thought that the phrases which continued to repeat themselves related to the task that I needed to complete for the business, but I realised that the phrases which continued to repeat themselves did not relate to the task that I needed to complete for the business. The phrases were 'bring it all together' and 'fall into place'. I did not know what the phrases meant in the context of my journey, but I knew better than to attempt to determine the meaning of the phrases in the context of my journey. I would allow the meaning of the two phrases in the context of my journey, to surface.

	As I reflected on the aspect of my journey which was the basis for this book, I could see that my existence, or the circles of my existence, had been converging throughout this book. Key events and key lifetimes were coming together and assisting to form the 'rapids' that I had just travelled. At one point in my journey I had believed that when I found God my problems would disappear, which did not occur. When I found God my problems had intensified. Knowing that we create our own problems to create the precise environment to ensure that we feel what we need to experience had not made my difficulties disappear, but my knowledge had enabled me to understand my environment. That my difficulties remained was because there was a reason for my difficulties to remain, and as I became fully aware, I would understand the reason for each environment that I created, as each environment that I created fulfilled its purpose. I knew that I had created my new environment, and I knew that we create our environment ourselves. I knew that I could not realise my environment without crossing the bridge from my current environment to my new environment. I knew that, at this point in time, the bridge from my current environment to my new environment, was my salvation. However, there was much about crossing the bridge and entering my new environment that I did not understand, although I did not know this at the time.

	I had changed my environment completely on previous occasions in this lifetime, and each time that I had changed my environment completely, it had been after I had made a hard conscious decision. On three occasions I had changed my job, and twice my company. I had changed my employment, my living arrangements, and my relationship within a relatively short period of time. Our employment, our home and our relationship are the keys to our environment. Our employment, our home and our relationship are the very foundation of each environment that we create for ourselves. Each time that I had created a new environment for myself previously, I had built the foundations of my new environment over a period of time, before realising my new environment. After I had built the foundations of my new environment, everything would fall into place around me. I did understand that we create our own environments to experience what we need to experience, but I was far from understanding the full picture in respect of how I was creating my new environment, or my new world. I would become aware that my understanding of how my new world would be created was reversed and what I believed needed to be the catalyst, the first event in the creation of my new world, was in fact the last event in the creation of my new world. Nevertheless, the pieces of the puzzle that were required for my new environment were apparent. It was my attempts to put the pieces of the puzzle that were required for my new environment together, which were reversed. I had reached a point where I was questioning, or perhaps I had simply not accepted, that I needed an external event to act as a catalyst for my new environment. Maybe I felt that an external event which acted as a catalyst for my new environment, would somehow detract from my example. However, as I drew on my experiences from this lifetime, I saw that there had been an 'external' event required to act as a catalyst for my new world, on each previous occasion that I had created a new environment for myself.

	These outside events had varied, but they had always been ultimately financial in nature such as a promotion or an offer of employment, or delayed funds suddenly available precisely when I needed them. I viewed the clearest example of creating a new environment for myself in isolation. I had been experiencing an environment which was extremely difficult for me, regardless of which aspect of my environment I considered. Effectively, my environment had been an environment in which I received no relief from pressure, and my existence was one of constant pressure. This pressure was so intense and so constant that I required all of my strength not to relieve the pressure permanently, or what I believed at that time would be permanently. I had known what I needed to do to extract myself from my environment. I had known that I would extract myself from my environment, but I was unable to extract myself from my environment due to my financial resources, or a lack thereof. At the time I had despaired at ever being able to extract myself from my environment, because I was financially trapped by my own conscious choice, within my environment. It was then that 'outside' events came into play. I was offered alternative employment which increased my salary by 50%, and by accepting the alternative employment I was 'given' various long service and other funds that allowed me to establish my new home, with my new job funding a mortgage on a second property, Rose having retained my previous home. At the time it was the offer of alternative employment, which was the 'outside' event that provided my 'salvation'. I knew that my salvation occurred when my salvation occurred because the events had been foreseen, which was why I 'knew' that there was a solution to my difficult environment, even though I had despaired for months, or perhaps years that the solution to my difficult environment would present itself. The principles which had applied four years previously applied now, but I had repeatedly questioned the need for an outside event, which would be required to allow me to take the final step into my new environment. I had questioned whether such an event could be a part of the example. I had questioned whether I would lead others to expect their own outside event, if an outside event carried me across the threshold to my new world.


	An outside event which acted as a catalyst and provided salvation was exactly what needed to occur, and that an outside event which acted as a catalyst and provided salvation would occur, was a part of the example of the reality of existence, that I had experienced myself on previous occasions. Despite having experienced the requirement for an outside event which acted as a catalyst and provided salvation previously, I had repeatedly attempted to justify to myself that an outside event which acted as a catalyst and provided salvation was necessary. I had struggled with how the need for an outside event which acted as a catalyst and provided salvation fitted within my example that we create our own world. When I had changed my environment on another occasion, eight years previously, the outside event which acted as a catalyst and provided salvation had been a 'windfall' from my father's estate, which had funded my new world. Each time that I had created a new world for myself in the past, I had made a conscious decision. I had laid the foundation for my new world, but I had been unable to realise my new world, until I had received the benefits of an external event, which had acted as a catalyst to carry me across the threshold into my new world. The reality of an external event was the missing step, the reality of an external event was the point that I had been missing. I had been told that an external event would occur, and I had known that an external event would occur, as I had previously known that an external event would occur. I had known that an external event needed to occur, but I had struggled because I did not see, until this time, when I was ready to see, how an external event fitted into my example.

	The concept of salvation being provided from an ‘external’ source was very much a part of the example and therefore necessary. In fact, I could see the reality of an external event all around me, now that I had chosen to see the reality of an external event. The ‘external’ event which had been foreseen, and which applies each time that we are ready to change our environment is the link which was missing from the perspective of my journey. I was ready to ask one more question, ‘why is an external event necessary?’ The need for an external event does seem to contradict much of what I have become aware of in respect of creating our own environment. God asked, “Have I not said that the truth is contained within all, and within the lifetimes of all?” I replied, “Yes.” “Have I not explained why it is necessary to experience salvation on the earth plane?” “Yes.” “Have I not shown that all of the principles of existence apply, regardless of the level of awareness?” “Yes.” “Have your own life experiences not confirmed that all of the principles of existence applied, at your various levels of awareness?” “Yes.”

	"Explain to me why an external event is necessary." "An external event demonstrates and allows souls to experience that salvation is provided by having faith in God, which occurs because the external event has been both chosen and foreseen, but for salvation to be salvation, our salvation must appear from an 'external' source." "Have you not experienced the principles of salvation. before you acknowledged the existence of God?" "Yes, but in each experience the occurrence of an external event was the result of following my instinct. By following my instinct, I was having faith in God, because God and my instinct are the same thing. That I chose to follow my instinct, and did not believe in God, did not change the reality that having faith in God leads to salvation. The labels that I applied previously, or the labels that I apply now, have no bearing on reality." "Why does the occurrence of an external event fit within your example?" "The occurrence of an external event which acts as a catalyst, is a part of reality." "So God the ocean, effectively assists God the single drop." "Yes." "Is God the ocean, assisting God the single drop not interference?" "No, because the experience has been chosen." "Have you yourself ever been used as a catalyst to provide the 'external' event that allowed another to change their environment." "Yes, I have on many occasions. There is one significant example of me being used as a catalyst to provide the 'external' event that allowed another to change their environment, but I have only been criticised as a result."

	"Did you expect appreciation?" "Yes, I suppose I did expect appreciation." "Do not expect appreciation. You do not deserve appreciation. You are fulfilling your task. Those who fulfil a 'spiritual' role do not fulfil a 'spiritual' role to be appreciated, as you are aware. That you looked for appreciation previously, was because you were unaware." "Yes, I know. I do not seek appreciation anymore." "No, but you would still like appreciation, you are attached to the earth plane. Do you think that it was coincidence that you have experienced being a catalyst to provide the 'external' event that allowed another to change their environment, from within your controlled environment?" "Not at all. Being used as the 'external' event that allows another to change their environment, will form a part of my future role." "Do your experiences in providing the 'external' event that allowed another to change their environment, just happen to be perfect for your role?" "Yes, and it is not a coincidence that now that it is time for me to understand the truth in respect of an external event that allows us to change our environment, I have experiences from both sides of the coin to draw on." "So what is left to experience in respect of an external event that allows us to change our environment?" "To experience an external event that allows me to change my environment again, from a position of awareness." "So you could not experience the concept of an external event or catalyst again, until you became fully aware of how an external event or catalyst fitted within the puzzle of existence?" "Yes, that is correct."

	I crossed to the spirit plane. The line between planes was becoming less distinct all of the time. I experienced every sight and every sound, every touch of the spirit plane. Tension which had been in my upper back for weeks, was all but removed on the spirit plane. I hummed with my contact with the higher plane. Despite my positive spirit and higher plane experiences, I continued to want my salvation. I continued to want my difficulties to be over. God asked, "Did you expect that you would want your difficulties to continue?" I had begun to do what I knew I would now experience. I was starting to exist, to consciously exist, on all three planes simultaneously. A little later God said, "It is time to accept your role my friend. You are not asked to embrace your role, only to accept what is to come. There are no more questions to be answered. The picture is now complete. Accept your role, accept your chosen path, nothing more is asked of you. "The one, Jesus your friend, will walk with you. Seek Jesus' council when you need guidance. Look for no more signs, no more proof. Accept and live your role, live your awareness. Nothing more is asked. Your difficulties are now over." Regardless of what God had told me about looking for no more proof, I did continue to look for proof. However, mostly what I would find would be the opposite. It proved to be an interesting night in that my perspective moved from plane to plane. Each time that I had even considered working that day, I became extremely agitated. I could not work. At one point, I considered whether perhaps I was insane after all, but my body had tingled and buzzed from my contact with the higher plane, and I had entered The Hall Of Masters, and I heard my own footsteps on the wooden floor in The Hall Of Masters.

	My experiences had occurred, because I had felt my experiences. Everything that I had experienced since my journey had began had occurred. There had been too much external confirmation of my experiences for me to deny what I had experienced, and if what I had experienced had happened, then what I had experienced had happened to me. Everything that God had told me and everything that I had known about existence made sense. Every explanation that God had given me about each aspect of my journey had not only made sense, but fitted a little too perfectly to be anything other than reality. I received an urgent note to contact my major commercial creditor. I did not know how to begin to explain my situation. Despite the ever mounting pressure which seemed to be perfect for what I was experiencing, especially when combined with my inability to work, I knew that I had no reason to worry. I had always known that I had no reason to worry, and all I had ever really wanted was to have the pressure removed from me. It was and it had always been, the pressure which concerned me, not the end result. In fact, the end result of my journey had never really been in doubt. Even when I realised that I had effectively lost everything, and even though I was concerned for my family's assets and for my wife, it was not the end result of my journey that had concerned me. What had concerned me, was what I would need to experience, prior to the end of my journey. Even though I had known that I was not concerned about the end result of my journey, throughout my journey, there had been occasions when I had lost sight of the end result of my journey. Occasions, when I was unable to see passed the pressure which did what the pressure was designed to do, and created an environment of difficulties. I considered seeking guidance, but I failed to see what I could be told that had not already been said.

	I reflected on all that had been explained to me since I began Understanding Who I Am. I had known that the principle of what had been explained to me would be the subject of Understanding Who I Am, before I commenced writing Understanding Who I Am. However, I had anticipated that the explanations would have been provided from within an environment of salvation, not from within an environment of continuing and increasing difficulties. I found myself reflecting on my writing. Throughout all of the five books which recorded my journey to this point, whenever I had explained a concept, my mind had been blank and the explanation transferred itself onto the paper. I could not have invented any of the explanations that I had written, because not one concept that I had explained within my writing had come from my conscious self. All I would know, is that I would 'need' to write and I would start writing. Often I would read as I wrote, and I would not have a clue where the concept or explanation that I was writing would lead. The same principle applied whenever I spoke with God or Jesus or another master. My mind would be totally empty except for the conversation I was both hearing and recording. This principle had also applied to my past life regressions. Mostly, I wrote about the events from my past lives as I remembered them, but sometimes I recorded the events from my past lives after I had remembered them. None of these experiences had been invented in my mind, because the experiences had never been in my mind. In fact, the most notable transformation within myself, to me anyway, was that often, very often my mind would be totally blank, which occurred whenever I was observing, rather than experiencing my environment. That this was possible was a result of removing my conscious mind during the early stage of my journey.

	In the early hours of the morning, I understood that I did not really doubt. I did not doubt what had happened, I did not doubt what was going to happen, and I did not doubt that everything had happened to me. My environment, every part of my environment had been specifically and consciously designed to cause me to doubt. My environment was perfect, too perfect to be any thing other than an illusion. My environment may have felt real and I may have experienced my environment, but I had known that my environment was not real. That my environment was an illusion, was the point that I had been missing from the beginning of my journey, but I had also known from the beginning of my journey, that my environment which I had created, often with 'assistance', had been an illusion, an illusion within an illusion. I had not really needed to experience anything other than my awareness. My environment had been created for the purpose of recording my journey and providing an example, whilst experiencing my awareness, which was why only those who chose to assist me were affected by my environment. In fact, everything that had occurred since I was on the island had been a part of this illusion which had been my learning environment. I had known and I had been reminded often that we cannot teach anybody anything, that all we can do is create an environment in which they may choose to learn. Like so many aspects of my awareness, I had failed to apply my awareness to myself.