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1.1 We all hurt, we all have sorrows, and we all have doubts. Hurt, sorrow and doubt cannot be avoided, and we should not attempt to avoid hurt, sorrow and doubt. Hurt, sorrow and doubt are a part of us. We should embrace our hurt, our sorrow and our doubt, we should learn from our hurt, sorrow and doubt, and when we no longer need our hurt, sorrow and doubt we must let our hurt, sorrow and doubt go.
Our hurt, sorrow and doubt are not who we are, but if we bury hurt, sorrow an doubt, they become entwined in our soul, and hurt, sorrow and doubt become a part of who we are. Once buried within us, hurt, sorrow and doubt are difficult to find, and even when found, hurt, sorrow and doubt are difficult to extract. Many of us never do extract the hurt, sorrow and doubts which are buried within.
We all have doubts, we all have losses, and we all have occasional loneliness. We must not have fears. We must not have regrets. We must not carry guilt or our past mistakes within us. Fear, regret, guilt and past mistakes lead to insecurities.
We must not sleep with our problems. We must sleep on our problems. We must make our decisions with our soul. Our soul is the sum of us. We must ensure that our mind and our heart are balanced.
We must trust the instinct given to us with a faith born from experience that we have never gone wrong when we have followed our instinct, and we have always gone wrong when we do not have the courage of our convictions.
We must know ourselves and trust ourselves. We can compromise things, but we cannot compromise ourselves. We must know what is important, and we must know what does not really matter.
We all have moments when negative thoughts envelope us. We must learn from our negative thoughts, and we must lay our negative thoughts to rest. Our negative thoughts and feelings, and our past mistakes when we failed to learn, are our demons to be faced and fought and cast aside in victory.
We must respond when a friend reaches out, and we must reach out to a friend, when we perceive that we are needed. This will help us too if only to revisit a lesson. We must be content in the knowledge that we are wisely guided by advanced souls, a spirit guide, a guardian angel, past loved ones or God. We must know that the guidance is there, and that the label which we apply to the source of that guidance does not matter.
We must take time to reflect each day. We must let messages come to us. We must receive the lessons from the previous day or night, or our lifetime. We must understand the secret of happiness, and we must know true fulfilment which can only be obtained when we are our true selves. We must believe in ourselves.
We must have faith in the future. We must have the capacity to learn what we need to learn. We must have belief in our soul and our character. We must have a knowledge beyond doubt that we are worthwhile.
1.2 Life is a journey which we must continue. We cannot turn back because we have come too far. Sometimes we may try to turn back in moments of weakness. Sometimes we will take two steps forward and three steps back because we have failed to learn. It is sometimes difficult to go on, but we must go on. We must remember that our journey will have its own rewards, which will make our journey worthwhile.
1.3 When the lessons which we are given contradict themselves, there is more than one perspective, and we need to understand all perspectives. When the lessons which we are given are repeated, we have failed to really learn previously, and it is a very important lesson.
1.4 We cannot promise the future. The future is not ours to give, but we can, and we must share our hopes and dreams with others. We cannot change the past, our own or anyone else’s. We must learn from the past and not run away from our hurts.
We must hurt to grow. Hurting is growing, there is no other way. Because we are human, we will sometimes hurt other people, but we must never do so intentionally. If we do not hurt. If we run and hide from our hurt, we will be postponing our hurt for another day. We must not postpone our hurt, because hurt is magnified by time.
We must show people how we feel everyday. We must let people know that we care. We can only show people that we care by our actions. Our promises are nothing until our promises are our actions. We must show people that we care, because we want to. If we try too hard, our efforts will not be genuine. If we are too scared, our feelings cannot be shared. We must always do what is right in our soul. We can do no more, and we must do no less.
If we can do these things, our yesterdays will have meaning, our tomorrows will have hope, and most of all, our today’s will be wonderful. We must live for today. Today is the only day which we can live. We cannot relive yesterday, nor can we take tomorrow for granted. Today is all we have. How we use today is up to us. Nobody else.
1.5 We cannot let our head rule our heart. Nor can we let our heart rule our head. Both will sometimes be clouded and have a distorted view. Sometimes our head and our heart will be in conflict. The sum of our head and our heart makes up our soul, and our soul will always do what must be done, for our protection and well being.
We must let what will happen, happen. What is meant to be, cannot possibly be avoided. We can only prolong our unhappiness, and cloud our ability to live, if we attempt to avoid what is meant to be.
Even though we will not always see or understand, the reason why something has occurred today, we must accept that all things have a purpose, and that one day that purpose will be fulfilled. When the purpose of our experiences is fulfilled, we will be fulfilled too.
1.6 We desperately try to find the answer which we are seeking. However, when we look for the answer we cannot see that the answer within us, and that all that we need to do is to find ourselves.
1.7 We must not let fears and doubts rule us. We must not hide either from life or within life to avoid our fears and doubts. When we can no longer hide from our fears and doubts, we are left not only with today's fears and doubts, but also yesterday's fears and doubts. The combined weight of our fears and doubts, past and present, may nearly destroy us, literally. We have to fight our fears and doubts and win. We can do it.
We must not forget that our fears and doubts are with us each day. We cannot fight fears and doubts once, and forget to fight our fears and doubts until we are again forced to fight our fears and doubts. We must fight a small battle with our fears and doubts each day. Fighting our fears and doubts each day makes the fight easy. Accumulated fears and doubts magnify with time. If we fight fears and doubts in perspective, we will win.
To fight fears and doubts today, we must appreciate and be thankful for what and who we have, we must not mourn what we have lost, and we must not crave what we do not have. If we waste energy on negatives, we will have no energy left for positives and we will lose what we do have. We cannot change the mistakes which we have made, and we must not continue making the same mistakes. We must learn from our mistakes or our mistakes mean nothing.
We have today, we have ourselves, and we have our friends. The combination of these can give us what we all want from life, happiness. We only have to let it be. Today, we must not worry about tomorrow, we must not mourn what we do not have, but we must take time to enjoy what we do have. We must accept that something, God, fate, or past loved ones, is guiding us and protecting our soul. We must accept that there is a reason for everything that occurs.
We and only we have the ability to make ourselves happy. We must be happy with what life has given us at the moment. If we do not do these things, we will have nothing. We must fight for ourselves. When we find ourselves, we will like ourselves. We know that the prize is worth the battle, so we must fight our fears and doubts now.
1.8 When we wonder what will happen. When we ask why do we still become confused. When we question when our difficulties will end. We must remember that time will answer all of our questions.
1.9 When unwelcome thoughts keep coming into our mind. When our thoughts concern us, but we know that our thoughts should not concern us. When we are a little sad, or when we feel a little trapped. We simply need our own space for a while.
1.10 We are not made to live alone, either emotionally or physically.
1.11 Does what happened at another place and time really matter? Or does today really matter?
1.12 It is no use going back to yesterday, because we were a different person yesterday.
1.13 If we cannot be our true selves, we cannot live a happy life. To be ourselves is the only chance we have of happiness.
1.14 We must be patient. We must accept that we will reach our goal.
1.15 We cannot expect others to accept us for who we are, if we cannot accept ourselves for who we are.
1.16 Sometimes we have to go back, to go forward. Sometimes we have to go back to re-learn lessons, which were so easily forgotten.
1.17 If we are not what our partner wants, we cannot be what our partner wants. So we must not try.
1.18 Will the circle turn another turn? We cannot fight fate. What is going to happen, will happen. We are only going along for the ride of experience and to learn what we need to learn. Regardless of whether we flow with what occurs, or we attempt to fight what occurs, we must learn.
1.19 What will be, will be. We cannot fight what will be, and we cannot force what will be. Fate will keep us on our correct path, one way or another.
1.20 When we feel empty and alone we must remember that we are only human. We have felt far worse and survived. We only feel alone, because we have not found our true selves. We must use our time alone to find our true selves. When we find our true selves we may be lonely at times but, we will never again be alone.
1.21 Negative imagination is very destructive. Negative imagination fuels our insecurities. When our negative imagination is at work, we must stop our negative imagination, because what our negative imagination is doing, is entangling our insecurities around our soul.
1.22 When we keep making the same mistake. When we keep going backwards. We must remember that we have the capacity to learn. We will keep being given the same lesson until we learn, but we will learn.
1.23 When we try to be in two places at once, we end up nowhere.
1.24 We must have no illusions, we must know the risks. Only when we know the risks can we make our decision.
1.25 We want to be happy. We want to be ourselves. We want to be accepted. We want to be appreciated. That is not too much to ask.
1.26 When we want to know the truth about a given situation; we must ask ourselves why we want to know the truth about the situation? Will knowing such a truth change our life? Will we hurt if we know the truth of a given situation? Does the truth of that given situation really matter? We should know the answers to these questions, before we seek the truth of a given situation. Only when we know the answers to these questions can we be prepared for the truth of the given situation whatever that truth may be. If we still want to know the truth of the given situation.
1.27 We all need a little ray of sunshine on the darkest day.
1.28 There is nothing more precious than a friend who is there for us today. A friend who accepts us, and does not judge us.
1.29 We must not make excuses for others. We must not judge others. We can either accept, or not accept, that a person has a place in our life.
1.30 We must not allow anyone to ask us to give up our friends, or choose our friends for us. Nor can we choose our friends, based on their nationality or gender. Friends choose each other. Our friends enter and leave our life based on mutual need. All we can do is be open, be receptive, and allow friendships to occur.
1.31 When we lie, we are not being ourselves. This is the first step towards living a lie.
1.32 It is a sad fact that it is easier to lie to some people, than it is to tell them the truth. These people have no place in our life.
1.33 We must be ourselves. We cannot live any other way. If we try to live any other way, we are only existing. If we compromise ourselves, for any reason, we are not being ourselves.
1.34 When we do not see the point of our life. We become tired. We become confused. We become frustrated. We become depressed. We are neither strong nor weak. We simply do not care.
When we no longer care, we need to rest a while. We need to re-assess our life, we need to know where we want to go, and we need to plan how we will get there. When we are rested. When we know where we are going. When we have planned our journey. We will forge ahead, with renewed strength and enthusiasm.
1.35 Fate will dictate events. There is no need to worry, because everything will be in our best interest. Even if we do not know this now.
1.36 We all need a friend. Without a friend we might despair.
1.37 When we have to continually make hard decisions, we feel bad, we begin to doubt our ability to make decisions, and we become so frustrated that we feel like crying. The pressure upon us seems unbearable. However, if we trust our instinct, we will know that our decisions are the right ones.
1.38 We know what we must do for ourselves. We know that we must be strong. We know that we must take control of our lives, for once and forever. We must be good to ourselves, and only we can do it.
1.39 Fate will dictate events. We must be patient, and we must allow fate to take control.
1.40 When we have lost the intensity of our feelings for our partner. When we accept that we are in different worlds. When we accept that we cannot communicate. When we accept that we blame each other. When we do not feel close to each other. We must also accept that the end of the relationship is in sight and that the relationship has run it’s course.
1.41 When we know that what we are doing is not right for us, but we cannot help ourselves, even though we know that we will regret our actions later, we must learn how to avoid what we are doing. The only reason that we continue doing what we are doing is to learn, and we will keep doing what we are doing until we do learn. The only way to learn is to experience.
1.42 When we know what we must do, and when we do most things right, but not what is right for us, we feel that we have let ourselves down. We feel lost and alone. Sometimes, we are not strong enough to do what is right for us even when we have set goals, and we have made plans. Sometimes, we are so close, and yet so far from doing what is right for us. Sometimes, we do not know why we did not do what we knew that we must do, and we do not think very much of ourselves. However, we must not despair. Sometimes, we are just not strong enough to do what is right for us. We must trust that we will be strong enough to do what is right for us, when we are ready to be strong enough to do what is right for us.
1.43 Sometimes we have to sacrifice our hopes and dreams for a friend in need.
1.44 It does not matter what the difficulty is, one day we will realise that a hurt from which we did not think that we would recover is healed. When our hurt is healed, we will accept that we only needed time. It was hard for us to believe at the time of our hurt, but it was true. When we are healed, we will feel good, we will feel strong, and we know that a necessary phase of our life.
1.45 It does not matter what happens, we can dream. Dreaming can give us hope, but we cannot live in our dreams.
1.46 When we avoid situations which we know that we should not avoid, we simply do not have enough strength to fight now. Too much pressure overall can leave us tired and drained. We need some respite, we need to rest and we need to hang on until we can recharge and regain our strength. Even if the pressure seems unbearable at times, and it seems that we just cannot win, we must continue to do our best. We must persist. If we do persist no matter what we face, we will do more than survive. We will regain our strength, and we will be ready to face any situation as and when the situation presents itself.
1.47 Sometimes all we need to keep us going, is a friend.
1.48 There are times when we must turn our back on our feelings. Turning our back on our feelings will hurt, turning our back on our feelings will be hard, but we will survive.
1.49 We must accept that fate sometimes seems cruel, and let go. We must be confident that time will heal if necessary. Even when we are scared, and our emotions overtake us we must trust that fate is right and we must know that fate is really kind. We can be scared if we must, but we must also be strong.
1.50 When we have a dream, when we have a hope which we know will not be reality, we must let our dream go. If we feel bitter and resentful we are hanging on to our dream, and we must let our dream go. We can distance ourselves from our dream if we need to, but we must let our dream fade and we must let our wounds heal.
1.51 When we are tired of being depressed. When we are tired of being unhappy. When we are tired of going through the motions of life. When we are tired of fighting. When we never seem to enjoy ourselves, and we feel that we never will enjoy ourselves. We must consider changing our life, completely. We must make a new start. We must not be too scared to make a new start, or even too tired and depressed to make a new start. We must accept that it is time to change direction. We must accept that it is time to continue to grow. We must accept that it is time to learn another aspect of ourselves.
1.52 We must not depend on any one person too much. If that person is no longer in our life, our depression may overcome us, and we may doubt our ability to go on without having the person in our life. If this happens, we have relied on the person too much for our own good. In time we will know that we can and we will survive without having the person in our life, but we must learn to never again rely on one person too much, for our own good.
1.53 We must not crave what might be, but what cannot be. We must let go of what cannot be, for our own sake.
1.54 We are reflective of our environment. In a negative environment we become negative and in a positive environment we become positive. We are able to create a positive environment, but we may not be able to turn a negative environment around. We must create a positive environment, and we must avoid negative environments even when we have created a positive environment.
1.55 We may hate our life, or at least what we have let our life become, but although suicide may be tempting, suicide is not the answer.
1.56 We all need someone who will pick us up, when most people seem to push us down.
1.57 If we have everything that we need to go on, except strength. We must believe in ourselves regardless, and strength will come.
1.58 We know what we must do, even if we wish that what we must do was easier. Freedom can be lonely, but if it is freedom to be who we are, it is worth the price. We must ask ourselves if it is freedom that we want, or just peace and to be our true selves.
1.59 When we have hope, but compromise ourselves. We can only feel good while we are feeling bad.
1.60 When we are not strong enough do what we know we must do. When we cannot do what we know we must do. We must not despair. We are simply not ready do what we know we must do, yet.
1.61 When we feel great despair. When we feel totally alone. When we feel suicidal. We must do something, anything. If we do not do something, we will kill ourselves, either by lack of care for ourselves, or by a more direct method and suicide will solve absolutely nothing.
1.62 When we are ready. When we have done the hard work, whether we know that we have done the hard work, or not. Everything will fall into place.
1.63 We must give ourselves a chance. Good things will come to us if we give ourselves a chance. To give ourselves a chance we must keep doing positive things, we must avoid doing negative things, we must be patient, we must trust our instinct, and we must wait.
1.64 We should allow ourselves to drift into a book shop from time to time. We may not be looking for anything in particular, but if there is a book which we need to read, we will find that book. This is one method which fate uses, to give us a message when we are ready to receive a message which we need.
1.65 We will go through periods in our lives when everything that we touch goes wrong, and when there is hurt around every corner. We will reach a point where think ‘what else would I expect?’ This tells us that there is a negative pattern in our life. We must consider and review our life. We must find the negative pattern and break it. When we have broken the negative pattern, and not pretended to break the negative pattern, we can expect everything in our life to go right.
1.66 When we are on the wrong path, fate will give us pointers directing us to the right path. If we ignore these pointers, fate will become more direct. Often, the wrong path seems easier, and we want to be on the path that we are on. However, if fate dictates otherwise, fate will let us know that we are on the wrong path. Fate will be subtle initially, and then fate will be firmer, until finally and divest of patience, fate will grab us by the scruff of the neck, and forcibly throw us onto the right path, which is a very painful experience.
1.67 There are periods when we nurture our soul extensively, and there are periods when we neglect our soul for some time. Spiritually we grow like a child, in spurts. After we have rested we become reflective and contemplative, both consciously and in our dreams. This is when we are being told that we have had enough rest, and it is time for us to move on and take the next step.
1.68 We must always accept what we know is right for us, even if what we know is right for us is something which is very difficult for us to accept.
1.69 When we have put all of the past, in the past where the past belongs, a turning point in our destiny has occurred. These are very exciting times, because not only are we heading in the right direction, but we travel easier and faster without the excess baggage.
1.70 The reason that we have difficulty in dealing with change is that change is often forced upon us, before we think that we are ready for change. However, if the change has occurred, we are ready for change, even if we do not know that we are ready for change.
We try to fight change in our life, we invent reasons why the change should not occur, and we try to reverse the change. We will at times do almost anything, to stay within our comfort zone. However, even if we reverse the change, the reversal of the change is only temporary, and we will have to endure the change again. If a change occurs the only way for us to deal with the change is to accept the change no matter how painful the change seems at the time. If we do not accept the change, we will have to repeat the change and re-live the pain.
1.71 Sometimes we make the same mistake. Each time that we repeat a mistake, we repeat the pain. When we recognise the pattern within our lives which leads to the mistake we can finally learn, and we can stop repeating the same mistake.
1.72 We need a haven. We need time to reflect. We need time to develop a greater understanding of our life, or just breathing space to catch our breath before we move on.
1.73 The key to believing in ourselves is being able to spend time with ourselves, and not feel alone.
1.74 We must let our past feelings pour out of us. It will do us the world of good and it will have the cleansing effect which we feel at the time. We will start to leave our emotional baggage in the past where our emotional baggage belongs.
1.75 Sometimes when we care about people who we are close to, our caring only seems to cause us aggravation, but we should not stop caring.
1.76 When we find nearly everything that we ever wanted, what we have found is unlikely to feel right for us, because what we have found is only a good imitation of what we really want, and we know this. We think that it does not matter that what we have found is not quite what we want. We think ‘this is good’, or maybe even not too bad, and we think that we can continue on that basis, but we cannot. We have not reached our potential, and we are not being true to ourselves. We cannot be truly happy, and we cannot be fulfilled by ‘nearly’, or ‘almost’.
1.77 We may try to avoid facing a situation to avoid hurt, but we will have to face the situation when the situation can no longer be avoided. Each time that we delay facing the situation will increase our pain when we do face the situation. Only when we do face the situation can we move on to the next, and necessary phase of our life. Our choice is to face whatever we need to face ourselves, which is the easy way, or let fate face the situation for us which is the hard way.
1.78 It is all right for us to feel guilt. Guilt comes with accepting responsibility for our actions and choices. We cannot change that. However, we must use the guilt that we feel to learn from our mistakes, and then we must let the guilt go. Guilt is a very heavy burden. If we carry guilt around we will not have the capacity to accept the positive experiences which life has to offer.
1.79 We must not take on other people’s emotions. We may be empathic, we may feel other people’s emotions, and we may help people through a problem when we can. However, if we take other people’s emotions on board we will be taken advantage of, and this is an abuse of our soul in the extreme.
1.80 In all our relationships it is essential that we understand each other. Being open allows others to understand us. We must risk making ourselves vulnerable if we want others to understand us. However, we must be selective with the people we are open with, or we leave ourselves open to abuse.
1.81 We must be there when a friend needs us. That is what being a friend means. We must be there because we are a friend, and we must ask for nothing in return.
1.82 We must not allow ourselves to be torn apart by someone else’s insecurities. We must not allow others to play games with us. We should let others know that if they tell us what the problem is we will help, if we can. If we allow others to play games with us, their insecurities will be transferred to us.
1.83 We must not allow another person to compromise themselves for us. People can only compromise themselves for a limited period of time. There will come a time when they can no longer compromise themselves and we will both be hurt, there is nothing surer. Allowing another person to compromise themselves for us is not worth the risk.
1.84 We all need a haven. We all need a place of safety. We all need a place to go alone. We all need a place to face our problems, one on one.
1.85 Sometimes we resent our parent’s dependence on us for one thing or another. We never think that our parents are scared of anything, but we must realise that sometimes our parents are simply scared.
1.86 We should not be surprised if our partner puts our needs last, even when our partner knows what our needs are, if we do not tell our partner how important our needs are to us. Our partner may sense what we feel, but not the importance which we place on things. If we do not tell our partner what is important to us, how will our partner know what is important to us?
1.87 We are who we are. Although other people form a part of us from time to time, we are the whole. We must be comfortable with this, because without the parts of us that are from other people we would not be complete.
1.88 Often our friends just need to talk. If our friends choose to talk to us, our friends have read or our friends hope that we will be a good and understanding listener. This is good for us, because listening to other people often helps us too.
1.89 We must not carry emotional baggage. We must leave our emotional baggage behind, and we must tie up the lose ends. We must be unburdened to start the next and most exciting phase of our life with a clean slate.
1.90 For a relationship to succeed long term, both partners must be at a similar personal development level. A relationship cannot last unless both partners are at a similar personal development level. When one person has learned what they need from another the purpose of the relationship is fulfilled and the relationship is redundant.
We reach a stage in our personal growth where we need a partner who will complete our development with us. We will grow together and be the ultimate partner in each other’s lives. Some of us find this partner early in life, and some of us never find this partner. Nevertheless, finding this partner is the key to a lasting relationship which is different to joint existence. Finding this partner, together with an ability and desire to support our partner on equal terms, and having the characteristics to supplement the strengths and weaknesses of each other, is how we identify our life partner.
1.91 One day we will feel better from deep within than we have ever felt in our life. One day we will really feel good about ourselves. This is what happens when we have done most things right, and have finally learnt some lessons. It will be as if we have worked all of our life to become an overnight success.
1.92 When we develop inner confidence we start with a false confidence which develops into an inner confidence that for time needs to be bolstered by external supports. Our external supports may be a good friend, a quote that has a special meaning to us, or a book that got through to us. In fact our external supports could be anything. However, one day we find that we no longer need the external supports. Our inner confidence will exist without external support. Our inner confidence will be permanent and strong.
1.93 All that it may take for us to start believing in ourselves, is for someone else to really believe in us.
1.94 There will be a point in time when we realise that we feel good, we feel strong, we are well balanced, and we are very happy. When this occurs, nobody can take what we have become from us.
1.95 When we believe in ourselves, truly and deeply believe in ourselves, our journey through life will transcend to a higher plane.
1.96 Our life has prepared us for every moment. When we clear our conscious mind, knowledge and understanding enters as words from our soul present themselves to us, unannounced and unsearched. These words from our soul emphasise our inner knowledge and our preparation for the circumstances which we find ourselves. However, despite our inner knowledge and our preparation we will still have difficulty believing that we are ready for the circumstances in which we find ourselves.
1.97 It feels good to bask in true and positive love. However, we are not able to feel true and positive love, without first making peace with ourselves, and laying our demons to rest.
1.98 It does not matter how strongly we believe in ourselves, there will still be moments when we doubt our worth. When this happens, we must sit down and list our doubts. We must then compare our doubts with our life’s experiences. When we have made this comparison, we will see that we really have no reason to doubt.
1.99 We have a very precious gift to offer. Our gift is ourselves. We are worthwhile if we believe that we are worthwhile.
1.100 When we see a certain path and we believe that the path is right for us, we become impatient to travel that route, but we must remain patient and wait. If we are right, we must travel that route. If we are wrong, we cannot travel that route and nor should we. Regardless of whether we are able travel that route or not, we do not have anything to worry about.
1.101 We must not be frightened of making another mistake even when we feel that we have made enough mistakes in this lifetime. We must review our past feelings, our past mistakes, and our past misfortunes. If the opportunity which has presented itself to us truly feels right within our soul, and if we do not have to justify accepting the opportunity to ourselves, then accepting the opportunity is not another mistake. There is no guarantee that the outcome of accepting the opportunity which has presented itself to us will be as we hope, but accepting the opportunity will not be a mistake.
1.102 When we have found our right partner, we will know that we have met this person once or twice before. A lot of things which we do for the first time, are not for the first time.
1.103 We will always have ourselves. We need the confidence not to compromise ourselves, and we need the courage of our convictions. It is ironic that we need ourselves before we can love someone else completely.
1.104 Sometimes we feel a little depressed and a little scared even though we know that we should not feel depressed or scared. We know that whatever the situation is, good or bad, does not really matter in the scheme of our existence. Sometimes when something good is happening, we can have difficulty believing that something good can happen to us, and we expect something to go wrong.
We only expect something to go wrong when we start to doubt ourselves, when we lose faith in our worth, and when we stop believing in ourselves even for a minute. Often all this will mean, is that we still have to conquer some remaining demon. We will remove our doubt when we have laid our doubt to rest. We must look at the cause of our negativity and self doubt, we must identify our demon, and we must defeat our demon. Defeating our remaining demons may seem difficult but, we can draw strength from the battles which we have won in the past. We will often find that our remaining demons are easier to defeat than the demons which we have already defeated.
1.105 Everything happens for a reason. We must learn the lessons which are presented to us. We are capable of learning, but we are not always ready to learn. The lesson is then repeated as often as it takes for us to learn. Until we are ready to learn, we must suffer the consequences of not learning, but eventually we are forced to make the hard decision and learn.
1.106 It is hard to accept that our happiness only depends on ourselves, but it is true. We may share our happiness, somebody can contribute to our happiness, and together we may have complete happiness but, we cannot allow our happiness to depend on someone else. Nor can someone else’s happiness depend on us. If we allow our happiness to depend on someone else, we have only achieved artificial happiness which cannot last. True happiness can only come from within.
1.107 When we have always been hurt, we wonder why the situation should change. We must remove our doubt. That is when our life will improve. By removing our doubt, we are changing the pattern of our life, and that is what will make the difference.
1.108 We despair at eliminating the periods of negativity from our life completely. When we find that our periods of negativity in our life are less frequent, less intense, and less in duration, we know that it is only a matter of time before our periods of negativity are gone completely.
1.109 We know when we meet our right partner because everything that we have ever believed, every hope that we ever clung to, every dream that we ever had, and every future which we ever saw, has led us to this person. Our life has prepared us for this person, our life has taught us to recognise this person, our life freed us to be ready for this person, and our life has shown us who we are. When we know who we are we also know who makes us complete. We can give to this person the only thing which is truly ours to give, and not just a token. We can give this person ourselves.
1.110 When we become negative and depressed we can fight our negativity. This is an achievement, but fighting our negativity is not enough. We need to learn how to avoid negativity in the first place. We must look for the pattern. We will find that we have been doubting ourselves. We must understand why we have been doubting ourselves and remove the doubt. Removing all self doubt is the only way to remove all negativity from our life.
1.111 We may do everything right, we may believe in ourselves, we may know what we want, and we may find our right partner. However, if there are still underlying problems that one or both of us need to address, the underlying problems must be addressed before we can share positive love. If we are right and our timing is a little out we must be patient, positive love will happen. If we are wrong, we can only accept that we are wrong, learn what we need to learn, learn why we misread the situation, and be grateful that we did not have to live another mistake for too long.
1.112 No matter how bad things seem, no matter if we cannot see a way out of the situation which we find ourselves in, and no matter if we cannot see how we will survive the situation which we find ourselves in. We can be assured that our situation is never as bad as it seems, there is a way out, and we will survive either the hard way or the easy way. If we despair at ourselves we will survive the hard way. If we believe in ourselves we will survive the easy way. We do not always have direct control over the situation which we find ourselves in, but we do have direct control over how we deal with the situation, any situation.
1.113 If we do not know how to handle a situation, we must trust our instinct. We must continually remind ourselves to trust our instinct.
1.114 When something is happening in our life that we do not want to happen, we pretend that whatever is happening in our life is not happening. All that our pretence does is tie us knots. Each time that we are reminded of what is happening in our life we hurt all over again. In effect all that we are doing is prolonging our pain. We are torturing ourselves. We must accept what is happening in our life, no matter how painful whatever is happening in our life is at the time.
If whatever is happening in our life hurts we must grieve, but we must let our emotion out and we must deal with our emotion. Only after we have accepted whatever is happening in our life, only after we have faced whatever is happening in our life, and only after we have dealt with whatever is happening in our life, can we clear our mind enough for our instinct to kick in, and let us know what to do next.
1.115 When we put our life in another’s hands we are in purgatory. We cannot sit around and wait for someone else to tell us what to do next. We must make our own decisions. We must do what we must do for ourselves. Whether we like the result of our own decisions or not, we can deal with the result of our own decisions. When we are sitting in no man’s land we have nothing to deal with. Purgatory is the worst place that we can allow ourselves to be in.
1.116 It does not matter what our problem is, we must face our problem. Our problems cannot be avoided, so we must not try to avoid our problem. We must face our problem, deal with our problem, and move on. Delaying facing our problem will not change our problem, but delaying facing our problem will make our problem harder to face, when our problem can no longer be avoided.
1.117 We say that we ‘just want to be happy’, which is the problem in itself. We cannot ‘be happy’. We are either happy, or we are not happy. We waste lifetimes looking for happiness. Happiness is not something which we can find. We must live happiness. Happiness is that simple.
1.118 When we really know what we want from life we remove most of the pressure from ourselves. The difference between thinking that we know what we want from life, and knowing what we want from life, is that when we know what we want from life we also know why and how. We do not aspire to what we want from life, we live what we want from life. Everything that we do is part of achieving what we want from life. When we know what we want from life, what we want from life will be dynamic, what we want from life will grow with us. If we do not know what we want from life, we are living in circles.
1.119 We cannot grasp at straws or forlornly hang on to anything or anyone. We have nothing to hang on to except our inner underlying confidence. If we lose our inner underlying confidence, we will have nothing to hang on to.
1.120 If our instinct tells us that something is right for us, and we know that it will be a hard fight to attain what our instinct has told us is right for us, we must trust that attaining what our instinct has told us is right for us will be worthwhile. We must not give up our goal. However, we must not pursue our goal desperately. We must allow destiny to take a hand and we must allow our instinct to guide us. It may seem that our instinct is leading us away from our goal, but we must trust our instinct to guide us to what is right for us.
1.121 It does not matter if all seems lost, it does not matter if we do not know what to do next and it does not matter how low we sink. We will bounce back. As soon as we accept this, we have started to bounce back.
1.122 When we lose our inner confidence, even temporarily, we lose hope. Life without hope is at best existence, and the next step down achieves nothing. We must never lose hope, and we must never stop living.
1.123 Sometimes it is difficult for us to make a decision. If we are not ready to make our decision, we must wait. We will make our decision when we are ready to make our decision. However, we must not avoid making our decision through fear of the consequences, and we must allow our instinct to guide us. No matter how difficult it is to face what we know is the right decision for us, it will be more difficult to face the consequences of making the wrong decision.
1.124 The only way that a relationship will be successful, is for both partners to give 100% of themselves. This means that we are meeting each other halfway on equal terms. If both partners cannot meet each other halfway and on equal terms, the relationship will not last.
1.125 When two people truly love each other, even the simple chores in life become a joy. Especially, if they do them together.
1.126 Nature’s love is the heat and the passion designed to bring people together and to maintain the species. Nature’s love is the love, which makes people want to be together all of the time and to shut the world out so as nothing else matters. Nature’s love only lasts so long. How long depends on the people involved.
There are many problems caused by what is, or what is not. left when nature’s love has run it’s course. There is no sadder experience than the emptiness which can remain when nature’s love is over. Despite this, nature’s love is important. Nature’s love cannot and should not be avoided. Nature’s love is the way to bring two people together to find positive love. Positive love can be difficult to identify, without the introduction provided by nature’s love. This is what makes nature’s love worth the risk.
1.127 Love for negative reasons such as loneliness, or wanting to belong, or wanting to be needed, or even a love based on the ego of wanting a good looking partner for others to admire and envy, is negative love. Negative love can be felt as intensely as any other love. Negative love causes people to ignore, or attempt to ignore whether they like a person or not. Negative love causes people to compromise who they are to satisfy the other person. We can compromise things, in fact we have to compromise things, if we are to meet someone halfway, but we cannot compromise ourselves, no matter how hard we try.
1.128 Positive love is what is needed to share a lifelong relationship. Positive love is a mature, deep and knowing love. Positive love is the love of knowing someone, seeing their faults clearly and not wanting to change them. Positive love is the difference between loving someone because of who they are, instead of loving someone in spite of who they are. Positive love is a love of not wanting to be together physically all the time, but knowing that we are always together, emotionally.
Positive love between two people provides a balance to each other’s strengths and weaknesses and makes two people more than a couple. Positive love makes two people one complete unit. Positive love enables the complete unit to face any challenge, and to achieve any goal without fear or uncertainty. Positive love provides a bond which can only come with a love which spans many lifetimes. Positive love places people in tune with each other and allows communication without words. Positive love places each other above everything and everyone else in their life. Positive love puts the other person first without fear that this will be abused.
We feel positive love with a deep inner certainty. We feel positive love without one doubt in our mind, heart or soul. We know that this person is the right partner for us. The love which we feel is too positive, too important, and too powerful for us to compromise ourselves. If either of us have to compromise ourselves to be together, then we are not both giving an equal amount to the relationship, and our unit will not be complete. The need to compromise ourselves will turn positive love into negative love, and that is a risk which we cannot take. When two people both see and feel positive love, nothing will or can keep them apart.
1.129 If we are with the wrong partner our spiritual development is retarded. After we have learned what we need to learn, no matter how significant or insignificant what we need to learn is, we feel that it is time to move on. When we have the right partner in life our development is nurtured and enhanced. We are together to grow together.
1.130 We must not push, unless our instinct tells us that it is necessary to push. Most times all we need is a little understanding and patience.
1.131 When we meet our soulmate, we are surprised to learn how good it feels that for the first time in our life we are complete.
1.132 When we care deeply about someone. We hurt when they hurt, and we rejoice when they rejoice.
1.133 As we reflect on our life we will see that there are periods in our life when our soul seemed devoid. Periods in our life when we existed, but did not grow. When we consider the timing of these periods in our life when our soul seemed devoid, we will understand the significance of these periods in our life when our soul seemed devoid.
1.134 We must reflect on our soul from time to time. Reflecting on our soul is good for us, and reflection on our soul allows us to value our time by ourselves.
1.135 We must know that we will be all right, no matter what happens in our lives. Our inner happiness depends on ourselves and only ourselves.
1.136 When everything that we ever wanted from life appears to be within our reach we become impatient because what we see, we do not want today, or even yesterday, we have wanted what we see all our life. We must know that if we are patient and if what we see is right for us, we will have what we see all our life.
1.137 If we truly love we must be able to give 100% of ourselves. We must also be able to receive 100% of our partner. If we truly love we do not need to keep a piece of us for ourselves. We will not lose our identity, we will enhance who we are. We will not be exposing ourselves because our right partner will not harm us. When we hold back, when we try to be someone who we are not, and when we want our partner to be someone who they are not, it is only our insecurities which are in the way. If we are not able to be ourselves and if we are not able to give 100% of ourselves, we have the wrong partner. If we have the right partner we will lose our insecurities, and we will trust one another completely. We will be enhanced through our completion.
1.138 When all seems lost and we cannot envisage a way out of our present situation, it is very easy to lose interest in ourselves and in life. When we are wallowing in self pity we do not see the point of anything. This is the time to grit our teeth, and if we do not do anything else, we must continue to do all of the things that we know nurture our body and our soul. We must force ourselves to nurture our body and our soul no matter how difficult so tha we can overcome the hurdle and be ready for the next phase of our life.
1.139 We must learn to tell the difference between arrogance and confidence in ourselves and in others. When we are truly confident within ourselves, and not just feeling confident we can easily and readily accept that we may be wrong, even when we believe that we are right without the slightest doubt.
1.140 There are times when someone leaves our life. They may leave our life temporarily, or permanently. No matter how much we think that we need someone, and no matter how much we want someone, people only leave our life, when we no longer need them in our life. We must accept this with the sure knowledge that if the person needs to be in our life again, they will be.
1.141 It does not matter how well balanced we are. It does not matter how confident we are. It does not matter how much we believe in ourselves. Sometimes, something or someone, can make us doubt ourselves. When this happens depression will set in and we will start to doubt ourselves even more. Our life’s experiences have taught us what picks us up, and our life’s experiences have taught us what drags us down further. If we learn from our past mistakes, we can pick ourselves up in a relatively short period of time. We are only down, because we doubted ourselves.
1.142 When we feel down but do not know why, we must go to a place of peace because we will pick ourselves up. We must let our thoughts wander, and we may find that we only felt down so that we would go to the place of peace, because we needed to find an answer, often to a question which we did not know that we had.
1.143 When all else fails, we must trust our instinct.
1.144 We must not say ‘I am going to try do this’, because we are telling ourselves that we are expecting to fail. We just have to do it, that is all.
1.145 We must not be concerned if we think that an answer is clear, and then change our mind. Often our first solution to a problem is only a step to show us that there is a solution. Once we have taken the first step, we can continue to the next step, and the next until we determine a better solution to our problem, if there is one.
1.146 We must listen to a friend who has a problem in their life. We will seldom have a solution for our friend’s problem, but by listening to what our friend says, and observing how our friend says it, we will see that our friend knows the answer to their problem. Often all we need is someone to listen to us, and give us back the answer which we have without the confusion and clutter that is in our minds.
1.147 Fate will run it’s course, but if we blindly wait for fate to runs it’s course our wait can be very painful. We must be aware of our instinct. If our instinct tells us to do something, we are being told to be proactive. The end result will be the same, although the end result will not necessarily be as we think we want. If our instinct has told us what to do, all we can do is act, and trust our instinct to provide the best result for us. It does not matter how hard it is to follow our instinct, and it does not matter how much pain we feel by following our instinct, the experience would have been harder, and the experience would have been more painful, if we had not listened to our instinct.
1.148 Knowing and believing in ourselves is an ongoing task. It is easy to lose ourselves or forget ourselves, especially if we compromise ourselves. If we lose ourselves or forget ourselves we will have to do all of the hard work again.
1.149 What other people think of us affects us all, but all what other people think of us really affects is our fragile ego. We have to rise above our own ego. We have to believe what we know to be true, not what someone else thinks of us. If we do not do this we are compromising ourselves to satisfy someone else.
1.150 We must not be afraid to show appreciation if someone does something for us, no matter how minor. If someone’s act is appreciated, we must tell them that their act is appreciated. Telling someone that their act is appreciated could make all the difference in their life and in ours.
1.151 Some think that we create our own destiny. We do create our own destiny by following our instinct.
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