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Searching for My Soul
Book Two Seeking the Knowledge Within

The Direct Route.

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God said, "The only way to the higher plane is via the direct route, this is the message which all teachers have delivered.

"The direct route is the easiest route, but the direct route is also very difficult. For example, feeling only love for a person who has killed your child has proven impossible for all but a few. It is apparent that the only way for my children to find their way back is to find the direct route through understanding the truth, which is the long route.

"By understanding the truth, that the earth plane is an illusion, they will understand that loss is not real, and learn pure love through truth. It is the only way.

"To love no matter what is done has proven too difficult for most, and the only way, for all who choose, is to see the truth. There will always be those who do not choose, such is the nature of choice.

"You are frustrated at yourself because of the 2,000 years that you have endured, but whilst you endured, I blinked. 2,000 years is a blink in the context of eternity.

"Understand why I do this. Does not a single drop increase the volume of the ocean? So too does a single soul, who finds pure love, increase the ocean of pure love.

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"The difficulty that we face is that the truth has become fragmented, and all desperately cling to the fragment of the truth which they have found. This is why the fragments of the truth must now be put back together. Each who embraces a fragment of the truth, can choose to see how their fragment of the truth is a part of the whole truth, and through seeing the whole truth, accept the whole truth. To lead all to the whole truth, by demonstrating how each fragment of the truth fits together, and thus completing the circle of existence, has become the only way to lead all to the direct path to the higher plane.

"Much of what you will now do is complete the circle of existence, so that all can see how their fragment of the truth fits, and through finding the whole truth, find the direct route to the higher plane.

"You must remember that differences are only overcome by ignoring them. If you focus on differences, the differences will grow and the differences will make it difficult for the whole truth to be put back together. It is the differences that are the problem. Focus on what is not different. Focus on me, and the differences, which are artificial, will be consumed by the truth, which is me.

"Remember this, because those who choose to focus on the differences will attempt to draw you into their focus. It is a trap, a difficulty you will have to overcome, if you do not heed my words.

"Have no fear of the future, have no concern. Trust me, and trust what you know to be true. Whenever you doubt, seek the truth within yourself. If you have not found a truth, do not pretend that you have found a truth, but keep searching your soul, until you know that you have found the truth."

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I reflected on those in my life at that point in time. It is extremely difficult to let go of the perspective of the earth plane, which I knew from my own experience. I had mostly changed my perspective, but there were still some aspects of the perspective of the earth plane, which I clung to. I saw the difference between how I viewed life, and how others viewed life. I was described as cold when I saw an experience as the experience was, and for what the experience was, but nothing could have been further from the truth.

I found it fascinating that people saw me as cold, when all that I had released was my negative emotions. My positive emotion, my love, had grown and was continuing to grow. I was starting to realize that we embrace negative emotions, and we see negative emotions as positive. We see it as a positive thing that we allow others to hurt us. We embrace our hurts like a badge of honour, instead of learning and letting go. The more that I saw that we embraced negative emotions, the less that I understood why we embraced negative emotions. Irrespective of the fact, that I had been a master at allowing myself to be hurt for many years, and I supposed, many lifetimes.

It was as if we felt that it was wrong for us not to put our hand in the fire, simply because we knew our hand would get burned.

The reality, that our souls are incomplete, causes us to search for the missing part of ourselves. We seek relationships, to find the other part of our soul, but what we find is an opportunity to learn with another soul.

If we are alone at any given point in time, we often become desperate. We desperately search for a partner, in all of the wrong places. How much easier would it be to use our period of solitude for the purpose that we have created our period of solitude, to look within and to get to know our true selves.

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When we are in a relationship which does not last, we look for why. We carry hurt, guilt, blame or whatever. Is it not so much easier for us to accept, hold no grudge and be thankful for the time together?

We have no need to take the approach of accepting, holding no grudge and being thankful for the time together for anyone else, in fact others will probably think that we are cold and heartless because we do not feel the negative emotion. We need to accept, hold no grudge and be thankful for the time together, for ourselves.

We should wish our former partner well, accept what has happened with no regrets, remember the joyous times we shared with fondness, not longing, and continue to live.

If we are given a period of solitude, we should appreciate our period of solitude, and use our period of solitude constructively to look within.

Some avoid relationships for fear of being hurt. This is a nonsense. Remember, we are the only ones who can hurt ourselves, so what we are attempting to do, if we choose to avoid relationships, is to avoid what we must do so that we will not hurt ourselves. How else would we find the other part of ourselves? We should not avoid relationships. If we view each relationship with positive love, we will not be hurt.

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I had noticed in those around me, that there are more people seeking the truth than I had realized. I was finding that I would hear from someone who I had not heard from for some time, and we would get talking. I would discover that they were looking for the truth, and that they were very receptive when I told them, even a small part, of my experiences. It was apparent that the time was indeed right to lead people to rediscover the truth.

In fact, the only reason that most of those people were contacting me now, was to provide me with an opportunity to see for myself that many were seeking the truth.

God said, "The only way to become one with God, is to become pure love. I exist within all, and I am pure love. All have pure love within them. It is not a matter of gaining God or anything else. It is a matter of letting go of all things, so that only pure love is left.

"Becoming pure love can be achieved in one lifetime, if in that lifetime a person suffers loss, experiences despair and attains a position of power on the earth plane, but maintains pure love regardless. Becoming pure love can be achieved in a single lifetime, and becoming pure love has been achieved in a single lifetime, by a very few. It is usual to take many lifetimes to achieve pure love, mostly hundreds of lifetimes.

"Pure love must be learned, pure love cannot be taught. That death is not real must be understood and accepted, so there can be no grief. Be happy for those who leave a lifetime, because they have learned all that they can learn in that lifetime.

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"Understand that those who kill were given the opportunity to kill, or not to kill. Those who kill were given the opportunity to cause suffering, or not to cause suffering. Those who kill have failed to learn, so those who kill will suffer themselves, in the next lifetime. Understand that if you suffer a loss, it is an opportunity to suffer loss, and to learn to respond to loss with pure love. All must understand the truth, and respond to loss with pure love. Those who do not respond to loss with pure love, will again suffer loss, lifetime after lifetime, until they learn to respond to loss with pure love.

"Learning pure love above all else is not an easy task. Learning pure love above all else is not meant to be easy, learning pure love above all else is a hard thing to learn, but learning pure love above all else is the only way to return to the higher plane. Those who have returned to the higher plane, want nothing more than for others to return to the higher plane. When you exist in an ocean of pure love, you will want to increase the ocean, so that there is more pure love to exist within.

"Pure love can be achieved without the knowledge of the truth of existence, but for most the knowledge of the truth of existence is necessary, to achieve pure love.

"You, yourself still become impatient. You are still unsure. Your road is still difficult, but your road is easier than your road was. Your road will continue to become easier, as you accept what you know. You know that this is so, and you know that you need to endure these stages of preparation, and understanding of what is so. The endurance which is required of you, will be less than what you have endured. Draw strength from what you have endured, and know that what you are enduring now, is nothing in comparison. Understand this truth and your path will be even easier."

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At this time I was in Melbourne for Sally's wedding. Whilst discussing some issues with the Melbourne office of the business, I saw many things that I could do in respect of the business. When I started to plan how I would develop the business, I suddenly became 'lost' again.

It was clear that if I pursued the business as my path, I would again be overcome by stress. I recognized the signs of my stress. I had not embraced the business for months, because I knew that I would be overcome by stress. As soon as I attempted to embrace the business, stress started to consume me immediately.

I knew beyond doubt, that I had been right not to embrace the business. I knew that I had only attempted to embrace the business, because I was afraid of the future. I knew that my fear of the future was ridiculous, but I felt that I was close to walking away from my old world permanently, and I was frightened. I knew my old world, and I did not know what my new world would bring.

I talked with Anne, who had again been presented with a crossroads, and again Anne was having difficulty making a decision. I did not know how to help Anne. I suspected that she would ignore the opportunity to change her path, and once again drift until Anne was given another opportunity to change her path. I did not know how many times Anne would be given the opportunity to change her path in this lifetime, but I suspected that Anne would experience a recurring pattern, until Anne made the correct choice.

Despite my suspicions in respect of the recurring pattern which I saw within Anne's life, I did not understand the circular nature of our existence at this time.

God has no gender. I refer to God as 'he' because I am of masculine gender, and because God's masculinity was conditioned upon me as a child. If I were feminine, to me God would be she, or could be she. Gender is unimportant. God is God. Whatever gender is used to describe God, is not relevant and not important.

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The current trend in many parts of the earth plane to avoid prejudice in respect of either those of female gender, or those who are a minority in one form or another is correct in principle, but is being taken too far. As with many things that in principle are good, the objective has become lost. As with most things there are those who see momentum gaining and join in. They join in for material gain, or to feed their egos and artificial sense of importance.

The one simple principle is that all souls are equal. If all souls understand and acknowledge that all souls are equal, there would be no movements to feed egos, and material needs. If all souls understood the equality of souls, there would be no prejudice and no need to fight against prejudice.

In our search to rediscover the truth, many are finding and embracing a part of the truth. This part of the truth is often used to discount another part of the truth. We are unaware that there are many parts of the truth. It is unimportant whether a part of the truth, or all of the truth is discovered. What is important is whether the part of the truth which is discovered leads to pure love.

Once pure love is embraced, the reason for our existence on the earth plane is fulfilled. All else, the truth of our existence, can be revealed on the spirit plane whilst preparing to ascend to the higher plane. Once pure love is embraced, the views of others are not criticized. The views of those who have found pure love are not thrust onto others, but are made available to others who seek to understand. Assistance is given when requested, but 'assistance' not forced upon others. Assistance will not be accepted, unless assistance is wanted, regardless of whether assistance is needed.

Pure love is felt for all, regardless of their views or beliefs. Pure love understands that all are entitled to their beliefs and their views, even those who criticize the concept of pure love, and all that pure love implies.

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I'd had eight Tarot readings during the previous twelve months. Each Tarot reading had been the same. All of the difficult times which I had been warned about had occurred, and what remained from my Tarot readings was the happiness and contentment which I would experience. I needed to understand that if all of the difficult times had occurred, so would the good things which had been foreseen. I knew that the good times would occur, I had known from the beginning of my journey, what was going to happen, but my path had been so difficult, for so long that at times, I found it hard to accept that good things could occur. In many ways, I was living on a promise.

I had incurred debts which I could barely service. I was struggling to stay involved with the business, to earn a living and to meet my commitments. There was a limit to what I could do, and the limits were very clear. I could do whatever I was given to do, and no more in respect of the business. As soon as I attempted to do more in respect of the business, I would feel the warning signs of stress setting in. There was no reason for stress to manifest itself, other than that the business was contrary to the path which I had been placed on.

I knew I was unable to stray from my path, but I did not know how much longer I would need to balance between two worlds. My path was a lot easier than my path had been, but what I had endured had taken its toll, and I often felt lost and alone.

I felt trapped in the crack between two worlds, neither fully in one world or the other world. I was tired of my journey, and I wanted my journey to end. Despite my tiredness and frustration, I knew that there was nothing that I could do but wait patiently for events to run their course around me. Knowing that I needed patient endurance, and being aware that I needed patient endurance was not enough. I needed to apply patient endurance, which I did not do.

I knew that it did not matter how frustrated or impatient I became, there was nothing that I could do to change anything. I needed to wait patiently, but knowing that I needed to wait patiently, did not stop me from doing the exact opposite.

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If I had known at this point, that I was far from the end of my journey, and that all that I had endured, I would have to continue to endure, I would not have believed that I could continue my journey. However I believed, and I continued to believe, that my Journey's End would be around the next corner. My belief that my Journey's End would be around the next corner is what kept me going. I always believed that my journey would soon end.

If my journey had been to pure love, I would have completed my journey at this point. However, my journey was beyond pure love. In fact my journey would prove to be beyond awareness itself. However, at this point in time, I did not know or even conceive where my journey would lead.

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